GC People are right – Everything is trans people’s fault

Picture of someone stepping on bubblegum

(Edited by Schroomy)

What a week it’s been. And it has totally changed how I see everything.

I now believe that everything bad that has ever happened is trans people’s fault.

I don’t come to this decision lightly because I’ve always believed that people are responsible for their actions. I’ve always believed that even if people have the best of intentions or the very best reasons for taking some harmful action…that was on them. Just like that time I had the best of intentions when I ate twelve chicken wings in the middle of the night. I believed that decision was on me.

Nope! All wrong. It’s trans people who are responsible for everyone else’s decisions and actions just like it was the chicken shop’s fault for making me buy and eat all those wings at once. It was the pub’s fault that I chose to drink 15 bottles of pear cider and I had no agency in any of it. The broken toilet that resulted from this was not my fault. I had no choice! But tell that to my housemates.


We absolutely took everything from Graham Linehan. We absolutely did that. We took away his career, his marriage, everything. It is just like he said in an astonishing and not at all ridiculous interview he gave to transphobic eye/ear abuser Stephen Nolan recently.

We forced his wife to leave him. How you may well ask? Because we are the reason he chose to ditch a successful career in television to endlessly talk about how the ‘trans cult’ is evil. We made him do that. How could he not? We are just so inherently terrible that the natural human response is to spend 12 hours a day, every day, online rage-crying over our existence for five years. How can any cis person choose to do anything else?

A picture of Liberal Democrat peer Brian Paddick
A picture of Brian Paddick, someone who does not exist because he isn’t crying due to our existence.

Maybe if it wasn’t for us being so terrible, he could have tackled the ‘trans cult’ in smarter ways. Maybe if we just didn’t exist in reality as much as we do, he could have raged about us only some of the time, and used his wealth to support the anti trans groups he claims to love.

But we fucked that right up for him and forced him to flush it all down. We forced him to publicly attack his former friends and colleagues. We forced him to draw up a list of ‘traitors’ and accuse them of enabling a predator cult by just being there. What bastards we are.

What employer is going to risk employing a man with a proven history of accusing former friends and colleagues of enabling pedophilia? That is on us. We forced him to do that and now nobody will employ him and his family is gone.

Another recent example was when comedian Jen Ives chose to attend the LGB Alliance conference last year and was verbally abused by at least one attendee.

That was her fault. Because she clearly doesn’t care that the presence of a trans person is so inherently infuriating that people can’t help but lose control – they can’t not scream at us and call us paedophiles. How dare she be near a person and MAKE THEM go and get a camera and record themselves calling her a paedophile. How dare she then, months later, force the man to release it online for all to see. How dare she, and how dare any trans person who does that to someone else.

And then we get to the horrific invasion of Ukraine by Putin. Which several right-wing journalists have attributed to trans people.

At first I couldn’t see how trans people fighting for rights could have anything to do with Putin’s fascist dream of remaking the Russian empire. But I can’t not see it now.

You see, whilst we were all busy trying to argue that maybe we should be allowed to pee in a public toilet without getting attacked… what we were really doing was distracting everyone so nobody on Earth would notice 130,000 troops showing up on the border of Ukraine. That is why nobody noticed when the invasion began. Not the American intelligence services, not the UK government, not even the global news media.

They were all too busy reacting in rage to us, against their will. This is why it is only in the last couple of days that anyone has even noticed the war.

On Friday, Putin announced that the west likes to cancel people, citing JK Rowling’s supposed cancellation as evidence of the West trying to cancel Russia unfairly.

We are so inherently annoying that a genuine fascist dictator argued that we are as harmful and disgustful as COVID-19 and that he has done nothing wrong when it comes to bombing and killing innocent Ukrainian people.

He is of course right. Remember that time when the government told everyone to stay inside because transgender people are just that fucking annoying? How we brought society to a standstill and our very presence killed millions across the world? How the entire global community was totally unable to foresee the invasion of Ukraine because of us?

Other people’s actions and choices are our responsibility. You see, because we’re so disgusting, cis people simply lose all control and can’t help but distract entire nations on the eve of war, force adult men to quit their jobs and attack their friends, and cause members of the registered charity the LGB Alliance to scream obscenities at us.

Some of you may be reading this and thinking: “Michelle, this just sounds like scapegoating, an abuse tactic consisting of blaming the victim for everything to cover up their own bad behaviour.”

And to those people I say… Shut up. Stop talking. We are the problem, because other people have decided that they cannot act rationally or decently if they so much as remember that we exist.

And that is the only thing that matters, because cis people’s feelings don’t care about facts.